Category: wellbeing

10 Easy Ways to Purposefully Calm Overwhelm

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10 Easy Ways to Purposefully Calm Overwhelm

 10 Easy Ways to Purposefully Calm Overwhelm

We get overwhelmed when things become too much for us to handle, or when, subjectively, it feels that way.

When little stressors accumulate over time, or too many of them hit us all at once, it is natural to feel we cannot cope.

How overwhelm affects us.

Regardless of the causes, elevated stress levels or overwhelming feelings affect the body by releasing stress hormones like cortisol. The result is physiological changes, including a pounding heart, faster breathing, muscle tensing, and sweating. The body’s combined reactions to stressful events are called the fight, flight or freeze responses.

The normal cycle is for the body to recover after stress; at that point, it stops releasing stress hormones.

However, a constant release of cortisol with no recovery period after a triggering event takes a long-term toll on your body. If this persists over time, some expected outcomes are raised blood pressure, inflammation, and an increased predisposition for depression and anxiety.

When we have ADHD, it is all too easy to tip into feeling overwhelmed, as many of my coaching clients know first-hand. This is partly due to the large amounts of information we take in through our senses every second of the day. Without the ability to filter out and dismiss irrelevant or unhelpful sensory input, our brains will soon feel overloaded.

Overwhelm can also result from things coming in faster than we feel we have the resources to deal with. This perception can easily trip us up, as it is common for all human beings to underestimate our own resourcefulness and strengths. We can counteract this tendency by learning more about our strengths.

Our bodies hold the keys.

When we have ADHD, we are so often focused on our thoughts or on what’s next, we are largely oblivious to the signals our bodies send us about what’s happening below our necks.

Our bodies are a fantastic source of information we can tap into to understand how we navigate our environment.

A raised heart rate and faster breathing may signal a stress response, with the sympathetic nervous system dominant. In comparison, a slower heart rate and slower breathing give our brain feedback that the body is feeling relaxed. In this state, a branch of the autonomic nervous system, the parasympathetic nervous system, becomes dominant.

For more on this subject, this article gives a clear explanation and breakdown of the various parts of the autonomic nervous system and how they connect to different areas of the body.

The parasympathetic system is also known as the rest and digest system.

When this is engaged, our breathing and heart rate are slower.

Techniques that work

You can use techniques that boost the parasympathetic nervous system to manage your stress responses. This is good for your brain and good for you, both short and long-term.

Activating the Parasympathetic Nervous System is a reliable way to reduce feelings of overwhelm.

When the parasympathetic nervous system is activated, it produces a feeling of calm and relaxation in the mind and body. You can learn to activate your parasympathetic nervous system to immediately reduce stressful feelings. This will lift your mood, engage your immune system, and lower blood pressure.

There are many ways to strengthen and activate your parasympathetic nervous system, causing a relaxation response in your body.

10 easy techniques you can try for yourself:

  1. Bring awareness to your breathing, and try this breathing technique to slow down your breathing rate. Lying flat on your back comfortably, with one hand on your abdomen and the other on your heart, focus on lengthening the out-breath. Feel your belly rise and fall as you breathe in and then out. At the same time, send some gratitude to your heart area to thank it for keeping you alive.
  2. Feel compassion for yourself in your current situation.
  3. Spend time in nature.
  4. Get a massage.
  5. Stroke a pet.
  6. Focus on a soothing word like calm or peace.
  7. Practice yoga.
  8. Go for a slow walk and make a point of noticing your surroundings.
  9. Try something you find relaxing, like taking a bubble bath with music.
  10. Get a hug from someone you love.

Bonus way – Practice gratitude. Bringing to mind things that we can feel thankful for in our lives has a grounding and uplifting effect. 

When life becomes overwhelming, it is useful to bring to mind the people and resources that we already have around us. Having a selection of favourite ways to get calm to choose from can form a part of those resources.

  • You can use calm deliberately to relieve and prevent overwhelm.
  • Experiment with different approaches in various contexts and times to find the most effective for you.

The more you practice techniques like those above, the easier it becomes to switch to and activate your parasympathetic response and feel more relaxed.

What would it be like to spend more of your life feeling calm?

If you are feeling overwhelmed and would like to explore ways to get to a space of more calm in your life, please contact me here for a free discovery call.  I would love to hear from you.

 

Eight Sure-Fire Ways Cheer Yourself up When Feeling Down

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Eight Sure-Fire Ways to Cheer Yourself up When Feeling Down

People with ADHD often face challenges with emotion regulation, particularly when it comes to raising their spirits, or cheering themselves up.

One of the features of an ADHD brain is that cheering ourselves up in positive and sustainable ways doesn’t always come naturally, so having some ideas of what we can do to achieve that can be very empowering.

Here is a selection of evidence-based ways that you can use to cheer yourself up based on psychological research and therapeutic practices:

Practice Gratitude

Focusing on what you’re grateful for shifts attention away from negative emotions and toward positive facets of life. It also brings us into the present moment, which means our brains aren’t getting a chance to be worrying about the future or ruminating on the past. Try writing down 3-5 things you’re grateful for – research shows this simple practice can significantly boost mood and life satisfaction.

Get Moving  

Physical activity is a natural way to enhance mood, triggering the release of endorphins while reducing stress and anxiety. You don’t need an intense workout – even a brief walk, gentle stretching, or dancing to your favourite song can lift your spirits. Regular movement is strongly linked to better mental health outcomes.

Reframe Your Thoughts

Cognitive reframing helps us view situations differently, improving our emotional responses. When negative thoughts arise, pause and consider alternative viewpoints. Studies demonstrate that this reframing technique effectively increases positive emotions while reducing depressive symptoms.

Stay Present with Mindfulness

Mindfulness practices help ground us in the present moment, reducing our tendency to dwell on negative thoughts. Start with a few minutes of focused breathing or a guided meditation. Research consistently shows that mindfulness reduces stress and enhances emotional well-being.

Connect with Others

Social support is particularly crucial for people with ADHD. Many clients report that spending time with understanding friends and family provides significant emotional benefits. Whether by reaching out to a friend, family member, coach, or therapist, having strong social connections correlates with increased happiness and lower depression rates.

Introduce Positive Behaviours

Engaging in enjoyable activities shifts focus from negative thoughts while triggering the release of mood-boosting neurotransmitters like dopamine. Create a list of mood-lifting activities – from hobbies to watching favourite shows – and choose one when you’re feeling down. This approach, known as behavioural activation, is a core component of cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT).

Encourage Yourself

Counter negative self-talk with positive affirmations that resonate with you. Choose statements you can genuinely believe, such as “I am capable”, ” I am learning to do this,” or “I am worthy of happiness.” Research indicates that authentic affirmations can strengthen self-esteem and reduce negative emotions.

Extend Kindness to Others

Helping others creates a powerful sense of purpose and connection. Many people hesitate to ask for help, making the assistance you offer especially valuable. The appreciation you receive in return also generates positive feelings. Simple acts of kindness – from supporting a friend to volunteering – can significantly increase personal well-being.

Here are the eight proven ways to lift your mood in summary:

• Notice the good stuff – Take a moment to write down what you’re grateful for

• Move your body – Even a quick walk or dance can boost your spirits

• Reframe your thoughts – Look for alternative ways to look at things

• Get present – Try some mindful breathing or meditation to ground yourself

• Connect with others – Reach out to someone you trust who gets you and lifts you up

• Do something enjoyable – Pick an activity you know makes you feel good

• Say something kind and encouraging to yourself – Use affirmations you genuinely believe

• Help someone else – Small acts of kindness boost both the receiver’s mood and your own

These strategies provide some options for improving mood and emotional regulation. While particularly helpful for individuals with ADHD, in helping to cheer themselves up, these approaches can benefit anyone who wants to enhance their emotional well-being.

Boost Self-Esteem with ADHD

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Want to Boost Your Self-Esteem? Here’s 3 Empowering Strategies that Work for People with ADHD.

 

  1. Celebrate Strengths and Achievements

Focus on Strengths:

Firstly, we know that people with ADHD have many unique strengths, such as creativity, enthusiasm, and problem-solving abilities. By identifying and focusing on these and other strengths, you can build your self-esteem and boost your overall confidence.

Next, keeping a journal of daily or weekly achievements, no matter how small, can help shift your focus from challenges to accomplishments. Even a couple of minutes a day can make a difference.

Set Achievable Goals:

Chunking your tasks into smaller, more manageable pieces can make it easier to achieve goals. Celebrating your victories, however small, can provide a sense of accomplishment and boost confidence.

 

2. Develop a Support Network

Seek Support from Loved Ones:

Family and friends who are understanding and supportive can provide encouragement and positive reinforcement. Seek out the company of those whom you feel accept and get you. Sharing feelings and challenges with trusted individuals can help relieve stress and boost morale.

Join Support Groups:

Furthermore, connecting with other people with ADHD provides a sense of community and understanding. Support groups offer spaces to share experiences, learn strategies, and give and receive encouragement. Meetup offers many opportunities to meet people who have something in common. If there’s no support group in your area, you could set one up.

 

3. Engage in Positive Self-Talk and Mindfulness Practices

Practice Positive Self-Talk:

Challenge your negative thoughts when they arise. Replacing them with believable positive alternatives can improve self-perception. The first step is to become aware of your thoughts and notice them. 

Moreover, regularly remind yourself of your worth and capabilities. This practise helps counteract feelings of inadequacy. You could try setting a reminder to say kind and supportive things to yourself several times a day. Small steps build up to a big difference.

Mindfulness and Stress-Reduction Techniques:

Additionally, bring in Mindfulness practices such as meditation, breathing exercises, and yoga to help manage stress and improve focus. These practices can enhance self-awareness and self-acceptance, contributing to higher self-esteem.

Finally, by focusing on strengths, seeking support, and engaging in mindfulness practices, you can work towards improving your self-esteem and overall well-being.

 

If you would be interested in working with a empathetic and encouraging coach so you can put the above suggestions into practice as helpful habits for yourself, then please contact Coach Anna here.

The Impact of Being Able to Have a Break from Caring.

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The Impact of Being Able to Have a Break from Caring.

It’s Carers Rights day on Thursday 24th November. But wait, you may say, what is a carer and who are they caring for?

Defining a carer.

Firstly it’s important to distinguish between a paid support worker or personal assistant and an unpaid carer. A carer means someone providing unpaid care.

When we talk about carers we are referring to people who are unpaid carers of someone with a condition, disability, illness or of someone who is older. 1 in 8 people in the UK are currently caring for someone.

Carer’s rights.

Carers rights include:

  • The right to a Carer’s Assessment and your identified needs being met
  • Rights at work and the right not to be discriminated against because of your caring role
  • The right to be recognised as a carer
  • The right to be included in hospital discharge planning
  • The right to register with your GP Practice as an unpaid carer to enable you to access health checks and Covid-19 and flu vaccinations
  • Carers right to a break

You can find out more about the rights and entitlements of carers.  Go here for more information:

https://www.carersuk.org/news-and-campaigns/carers-rights-day/find-out-about-your-rights

also

https://www.carersuk.org/help-and-advice/get-resources/our-factsheets

 Being a carer.

What’s it like being a carer of an adult with a neurodivergent condition such as ADHD or Autism?

There’s a lot of concerns and worry that the young adult may not be coping with day to day life.

Carers can spend a lot of their time and energy looking for services which can potentially provide support or help for the young adult, including finding professionals who can undertake assessments and diagnoses.

These carers, who are often the parents of the young adult, may not feel able to get a break from their young adult or leave them alone, or they may have left home but still be needing high levels of support. That could be financial, practical, dealing with services, helping them get organised, providing emotional support, making sure they eat healthily, and keep their homes in a habitable state.

Many parents of young adults with Autism or ADHD and other health conditions as well, who contact me for support or information are unaware they are carers. Some of them are not surprisingly extremely tired and emotionally drained. Having a break from caring can make all the difference to a person’s life. As a carer myself I could not continue to provide care effectively without regular planned breaks from caring.

There are several ways to have breaks that you could consider:

One – getting a break from caring from the person that you provide care for, in other words arranging for someone else to take over from you and provide care instead.

Two – getting a break from your “workplace”; for carers this could mean getting away from your routine at home, and even your home itself. Most people who take time off work take it for granted that they will be spending time away from their place of work, however for carers whose workplace is their home, this aspect is often overlooked.

Breaks can be short like a few hours or a day out for yourself, or they can be longer and involve a night or two or even more away from your cared-for person or away from your home.

Things I have noticed when I get exhausted from caring continuously without a break:

I get crabby and irritable.

Life seems less enjoyable and I lose my sense of humour.

Things seem much more effortful, and I have much less energy to tackle the everyday jobs. It’s even harder to summon up extra energy for trips or days out, as I feel too tired to be able to cope with them.

I lose my sense of perspective, and caring seems to take up all my energy.

I begin to feel hopeless and weighed down by my caring responsibilities.

By contrast when I have had regular breaks:

I feel energised and my mood is more upbeat.

My sense of humour returns, and I feel more light-hearted.

I feel able to cope well with the day to day jobs. I can plan enjoyable activities, knowing I will have enough energy to be able to carry them out and enjoy them.

I can broaden my horizons outside of caring and widen my perspective to other aspects of my life.

I feel rested, and that caring is a part of what I do, not the whole of it.

Support for carers.

If you are a carer and are feeling you could do with some advice and support, please do get in touch with one of the carers organisations.

Carers UK have a handy database you can search to find your local support organisations:

https://www.carersuk.org/help-and-advice/get-support/local-support

If you are based in Devon, Devon Carers https://devoncarers.org.uk/ has lots of information on its website. There is a Carer’s Rights Day being held in the Corn Exchange in Exeter on Thursday 24th November where you can drop in to speak to someone and find out more about what’s available.

If you’d like to discuss any of the above with Coach Anna, you can contact her here.